Friday, May 13, 2011

Glimpse {on Motherhood}

It has been extremely hard for me not to think about Motherhood and Mother’s this past week.  I had a beautiful Mother’s Day.  I couldn’t help but think about my own mom. I often think about her, and what it was like when we were young.  I wonder if she had the same struggles as me when we were young.  I wonder if she worried like I do.  I wonder, wonder, wonder.

In the midst of my own personal trial, I wonder some more.  …and then I call her.  She tells me that she did.  She recounted stories from my childhood of times when she felt overwhelmed, or pressured.  None of these memories come to the surface for me, and if they do I don’t recall her struggling.(I don’t remember her complaining)  Which was a good reminder to me that children never really see the whole picture; of that I am grateful. 

After talking to my mom, it dawned on me that my blog will be a small glimpse into my life.  What I write will be a way for our children to know more about who I am as a person and a mother.  It will show them who I was in 2011, what we were doing as a family, our struggles and accomplishments.

So… I went back to my blog.  I re-read previous posts and I realized there was a time in my blogging that I shared more and gave more.  It was a couple years ago.  I was in such a good place.  I wrote about my thoughts and struggles.  I shared personal revelation and self discoveries.  I kept a current account of what was happening with the kids.  I was even better about posting a few little projects I had worked on.  My blog made me happy.  Some how in the midst of having four children I lost that.  Along the way, I lost a part of me.

As I read on, I read my “What I have learned” series.  I am so thankful that I took the time to write all that down.  It has helped me through some of the struggles that I face now; and then it dawned on me that it may help my daughters someday.

So… in honor of reclaiming me and what makes me happy I am taking back this blog.  I am making time for it again.  I will post about our family and all that happens in this crazy family of six.  I will also be posting a new weekly post called Glimpse.  It will be similar to “What I have learned.”; because it will include my thoughts on life and life’s lessons.  It will be a glimpse in to who I am.

Glimpse will record some of the topics we may have discussed at the dinner table, how I felt about a certain subject, or what I was wearing in 2011. Glimpse will allow our kids to get a glimpse of what is rolling around in this all too crazy brain of mine.  It may also be a glimpse of what our home looked like; or a project I did.  It will help remind them of some of the foods I made.  All in all; I hope it helps them reflect on their childhood and how much I love them.

Along with Glimpse; I will still just post the average everyday things we do as a family.  Glimpse will really be more of a way to share me.  In a world, where mothers are so busy.  In a world where we

often times get lost in the shuffle of doing for everyone else. I am reclaiming me. Glimpse is my method for sharing who I am, reminding myself of all that I have that is good, and leaving my legacy.  I hope along the way it becomes something you enjoy reading as well.

After my conversation with my mother this morning, I remembered a line from one of my favorite songs,

 “Things are never what they appear to be, so many different pieces make up the whole of me. So hold me in your hands, and take me as I am.” Mindy Gledhill

I thought about how we can never really understand anyone’s life.  Nothing is never as it appears.  Just as it appeared to me as a child that my mom had it all together, and unless I ask her I can never fully understand what her life was like at my age. 

I think it would be wonderful if you would all join me in sharing just a little bit more and giving your family, children and friends a deeper glimpse in to your world.

And that is just a

 glimpse

into mine.

 

1 comments:

KW said...

Mom is so great, isn't she? She still always seems like she has it all together. I hope my kids will think that of me too. I like this new series, I am ready to start reading your blog more often like it use to be.

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