On my mind…

With the new year at hand, I seem to have a lot on my mind.

 

I previously shared my goals for 2011.  I am proud of myself for working on those goals, and thinking of them most every day.  Even tonight while eating a home cooked meal Jex said, “Mom, I noticed one of your goals is 4 home-cooked meals a week.”  I replied, “yes.”  He said, “I can tell it is important to you.”

…and it is.  Not so much for the reasons that some would suppose.  I do it so we share time together.  I do it so we share conversation.  Recently while watching a talk show (which I never do), I happened to catch an author who was sharing her book about the importance of home-cooked meals.  The host of the talk show replied, “we don’t have time in this day and age to cook for our family.”  The author replied, “you have somehow found 2 more hours in your day for the internet, how is it that you can’t find time to cook and share a meal with your family?

Family meals are almost always torture for me.  Our children hate grown-up food, and I refuse to make them something different.  I am striving to make it less about the meal and more about the conversation.  Any ideas?  Any recipes?  I am open to suggestions.

Speaking of watching a talk show.  Do you want to watch more television in the winter?  I sure do.  I want to sit here and eat double stuffed Oreos while I watch re-runs of the Cosby Show.  What I really should be doing is running and drinking some water.

I was watching the Cosby Show late in to the evening one night this week.  I was taken back at how mild the show was compared to what  is on television today.  My, how desensitized we have become.  Satan sneaks up on you quickly, doesn’t he?  I think I might have to start watching the Cosby’s more often.  Good Ole Bill has some great ideas for parenting.

This is one of 2 new owl necklaces that I got for Christmas.  This one is from my M in L, and the other from my Bestie; Krysta.  The simplest things can make my day.

I recently read a few items around the web that have me thinking.

First is this little article, the grapefruit syndrome.  You just have to read it to understand why I can’t stop thinking about it.  It makes me think about how quick we can be to judge.  I know I am guilty of this.  It is even worse because we feel that it is okay to judge our own loved ones.  I do believe that moving past the small things such as grapefruits and how we eat them is what has kept my marriage so strong.  It took me a while to learn this.  I am working on this with my children as well.  I am trying to be less of the monkey who picks and picks at her kids, and more like a lion who encourages them to be brave and able to do tasks on their own.

I love my husband. (just had to throw that in there)  What?  It is on my mind.

I also love my little Tess. She is the world’s happiest person.  She is always smiling.  I hope she brings that element to our family dynamic for years to come.

Oh, got a little sidetracked.  The second thing I read on the web went a little something like this:

 “it’s not the fingerprints on the wall that need my attention, but the people who put them there.” 

I am working on this.  I tend to get in a mood when I clean and get lost so deeply in it that I forget about all else.  I also plan my cleaning days and have a hard time stopping or changing my plans.  Like today when Stella asked me, “Mom, can you come have lunch with us.”  I said, “no, I have some things to do today.”  Guess what those things were?  Yes, you guessed it.  I learned a valuable lesson today.  I am working on it.  I plan to have lunch tomorrow to make up for my anxious brain that couldn’t see that lunch with them was more important then mopping the stickies off the floor.

I did watch this little video clip tonight and it  helped me feel less guilty.

It reminded me that I need to keep moving forward.  There is no time to look back, only time to fix my mistakes. (take the time to watch this, it is well worth it)

Did you know one of my kids favorite things is for me to tuck them in?   Especially Stella.  She counts on it every night, and it breaks her heart if I don’t do it.  It is about the only thing that can send her in to hysterics.  See… it’s the little things.  I can do the little things.

One of the little things that I could do better at is listening.  I really need to stop what I am doing and listen.  Do you shake your head and do the uh-huh thing while they ramble on about how many Lego pieces they have?  I find myself doing it a lot.  I plan to fix this.  I plan to listen better.

Speaking of listening.  Do you have people in your life that you will never forget?  I was recently thinking about a client that I had in beauty school.  Her name was Mertle Munk.  I have a hard time remembering my kids names, but I will not forget Mertle.  She was completely deaf, but so completely capable.  She was a very strong woman.  She had children and raised them to be wonderful people.  I remember asking her how she could hear her babies crying.  She told me how her husband would wake her at night, and during the day how she would check on them often.  Even though she could not hear her children, I am sure she was a great listener.  I happened to be in those first few years of marriage when I met her.  I remember her reading lots of books, and sharing lots of great tips on marriage with me.  She was a wonderful listener.

I loved Thursday afternoons when I got to do her hair.

Today, I realized that I want to be better at keeping the promises I make to myself.  I worry about following through with promises that I make to others, but less about the promises I make to myself.  I should value myself a little more than that.

I also discovered something about myself today, something that I have really grown to love.  I thrive on being different.  I love doing things differently than everyone else.  Sometimes, I find anyway other ways to do something than the way everyone else does it.  This can be good and bad.  Sometimes it can get me in to trouble.  On the other hand, I learn more about myself when I do.  Why do I love this characteristic?  Twenty years ago, I would not have been caught dead doing something other than what my friends were doing.  I like that I now value my own opinion more than my peers.  I enjoy standing out a little bit.  I wish I would have realized in high school that being different is a good thing.  How do I teach my own children this?

I have been thinking a lot lately about what it means to me to be a Mormon.  It is one of the most important parts about me.  One of the parts that I wish I shared a little more often. I am a Mormon, and it means everything to me.  I am also an average person that experiences trials and receives blessings just like every one else.  I can blend easily with a crowd.  I am an ordinary American woman.  I do, however, belong to the Mormon faith.  I love that it sets me apart.  It helps shape who I am.  I wish more people understood this about me.  I wish they understood that I am just like them in so many ways, without the pre-conceived notion of what a Mormon really is. 

I wish that people who meet me and don’t know I’m Mormon could see that I am different in a marvelous way.  That they would be intrigued about what makes me different. 

…and that is what is on my mind.