After the trial of your faith comes the blessing...

This month has certainly been an interesting one for the Swensons. Hence, the lack of posting on the blog. Needless to say, we have been under some stress. With all that aside now, I can say I have learned a lot about faith.

I thought that I was a very faithful person. I believe that good happens, and that when we pray Heavenly Father listens. I know that He answers prayers when He can, and I have used the Atonement to find peace. All of this was in place for me. Even as this trial showed up, I used everything I had learned but Heavenly Father still needed to show me how faith can really be used.

I wanted to share what I have learned. Faith isn't just believing that through prayer, fasting, priesthood blessings and such... that all will work out according to how you have planned and on your time table. Faith is believing that Heavenly Father has the best plan for you, even if it isn't when and how you think. I lost sight of that. I am someone who wants things to happen right now, and when my answer didn't come, I thought Heavenly Father had deserted us. That's not what faith is about at all.

As the days went by with no answer or solution, I was in despair. As I turned to Heavenly Father in prayer I asked him, "Have we not done enough? Have we not done our part? Why haven't you helped with the part that we can't do?" I knew that He heard my prayer, and I was reminded that after the trial of my faith will come the blessing. My Faith was certainly tried. In my final moments of discouragement, I offered one more prayer. It was simply: "Heavenly Father... I have given all I have and I am running out of strength. Please sustain me." He simply touched me through the Spirit, telling me that He loved me and that it was almost over. Just minutes after this prayer and answer, we received the answer we had been looking for.

I want to share my testimony of faith. I know now that sometimes faith means holding on until you can't hold on any longer. After the trial we will be blessed, for this life is the test. I certainly was tested these last few weeks, as I am sure many of you have been at times in your life. I hope what I have learned and shared can help you recognize that Heavenly Father will not abandon us. He listens, and He knows us. He knows our needs, and what is best for each one of us. Sometimes we just have to wait, and the blessing will come. It will be the right blessing for us at the right time.